Although I have briefly addressed the effects of affairs on small children, another topic that is often overlooked is the effects of affairs on the adult children. One of the big issues that comes up with adult children is that of betrayal. When the child learns of the parent’s affair, they often feel like they have been betrayed and that their childhood has been stolen. All those memories of childhood are suddenly negated by the action of the parent. In most cases the parents are oblivious to these effects. They often assume that since the children are now adults “they will understand”. It is not about understanding, they assume that the child will tolerate what they have done. In their minds, once the child is older they can now indulge themselves and not be seen as a ‘bad parent’. Not so. The damage is different that that which occurs with a small child. Although the hurts are different, they are still hurts, with pain and the sense of betrayal.
In the upcoming days, I will address this issue further.
Best Regards,
Jeff Murrah
