One of the dangers with affairs is the possibility of a divorce. With the possibility of divorce, there is the likelihood of parent alienation occurring.
Although this sounds like mediocre logical assumption, it’s important to accept that in having an affair you risk parent alienation. No one likes to consider it at the time, but the risk is real.
An affair may unleash a side of yours spouse you never have seen. The parent in them comes out and strikes back.
Since affairs are taken as personal attacks, when a spouse is threatened by one, they often react by making personal attacks back. When families are involved, the attacks often involve the children.
Whether intentional or unintentional the agenda often consists of making your spouse hurt as bad as they hurt you. When the attack is taken personally, the reaction will be personal. One of the ways to attack a person in such a manner is with parent alienation.
The risk of parent alienation is higher when threats of divorce are raised. When the divorce card is played, everything is suddenly taken out of proportion. The rules change.
When the legal system is brought in, suddenly perceptions become more important than facts. Fantasies and possible situations situations are now just as valid as reality.
All your spouse has to do is tell a fantasy story in the courtroom that the judge and jury can believe. Such stories don’t need facts, only plausibility. Once the judge or jury believe the story, you’ve got a problem with parent alienation.
This change in rules makes for a confusing state of affairs. Claims and threats of claims regarding parent alienation are made. In some cases, the lawyers are merely maneuvering for better visitation or custody, yet this maneuvering is often at the expense of your emotions and your wallet or purse.
Spouses who feel betrayed often betray those who betrayed them. So if you had an affair, do not be surprised if your spouse betrays you by accusing you of things that you did not do. These feelings of betrayal need to be dealt with rather than being ignored.
Best Regards,
Jeff
