Those of you who live with narcissists are familiar with the challenges of confronting them. Sure, it is easy to complain, bring something to their attention or tell them what they are doing is wrong, yet getting them to listen and accept what you said is tough. They often take confrontations personally. Since narcissists get so wrapped up with their lovers, anything you say about the lover will be taken as a personal attack on them. When they feel attacked on a personal level, they attack back on a personal level. The narcissists have a way with words where they leave you feeling wounded after any attempt to confront them. They can turn a simple confrontation into a major blow-up. Part of the reason for that is how they are so connected with the lover. In their mind, they and the lover are one. You may even hear them use terms like ‘we’ and ‘us’ when discussing the lover. The use of such terms is a clear indicator of the bonding that has taken place. Since a threefold cord is not quickly broken (Eccl. 4:12b), the narcissist find strength in their bonding with the lover, even if it is only in their own minds. They draw strength from that bonding. They believe that they are a team, united in opposition to you.
Nothing in this Work is intended to replace common sense, legal, medical or other professional advice. If your situation warrants it, please seek competent professional counsel.